Last week I met a woman for the first time and, as most moms do, we started talking about our kids. Over the course of our conversation I mentioned that Fox has autism. Her response was: "Oh, but your other two are normal?" Wow. WOW. Really?! Dictionary.com's definition of normal is: conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural. You know what? I don't necessarily want my children to conform to the standard or the common type, or to be "regular". And there is certainly nothing that isn't "natural" about my precious little boy. I know... or at least sincerely HOPE... that she didn't mean it the way that it came out, but boy did it hurt. I was too blown away to say anything other than "uhh, yeah"... but wish that I had the time to come up with something witty to say in response. One of the many things that Fox has taught me is to try to be sensitive in the way that I speak about people... to recognize that people's disabilities or challenges don't define them. I won't refer to him as "autistic", but rather as a child who has autism. Just like a child who has Down Syndrome shouldn't be referred to as a "Downs baby" or anything similar. Everyone is a person first & foremost and these things should not define them. You could tell by the way she said it that she felt as though I must be so thankful to have two "regular" children... but you know what? I wouldn't change a single thing about my little man. Not one. Yes, there are challenges that come with having a child with special needs, but that is what makes him who he is, and he is the absolute PERFECT, not "regular", little boy for me.
xo Betsy
